I've got a feeling...that 26 is gonna be a good year

Time for my monthly update (I still can't believe I've only been posting once a month.) But a lot has happened in June.

In the past 30 days, I've been accepted into grad school, celebrated my 26th birthday and been offered a new job.

First of all, I'll be staying in D.C.! The decision was basically made for me (I got into one grad school program and not the other) so it was nice not having to choose between the two.

I celebrated my 26th birthday by drinking sangria and wine at the National Sculpture Garden and then venturing to the waterfront in Georgetown. The night began splendidly...and ended with my drunk-dialing my father.

I have no idea what made me so upset, but I was bawling and telling my poor father he needed to come to D.C., stat. (PS-it was only 11:30 p.m.) Thankfully, my roommate grabbed the phone from me and told my dad I was just upset about turning 26. Thanks, Rooms! I will be avoiding large quantities of wine for a while...

A week ago, I was offered a new job. I'll be working in the city doing work more in line with what I went to school for in the first place. I'm beyond excited and think it will be open a lot of doors for me career-wise. I'm also stoked to experience happy hours in D.C...haven't gotten to do that much while working in the 'burbs.

In August, I start grad school at George Mason. My classes are Tuesdays and Thursday from 7:20-10 p.m. I can't decide if it was a genius idea to go back to school or if I'm a glutton for punishment. Either way, it will be interesting to see if I can abandon some of my procrastinating tendencies. Pulling all-nighters and then working an eight-hour day would NOT be pretty.

It's crazy how quickly things can change. I've wanted them to for so long, it's hard to believe it's actually happening.

I think this calls for a summer-long celebration!

You Know It's a Good Night When Miss Procras. Passes Out

I'm not a mean drunk. Or a dramatic lush. I'm actually the exact opposite.

I become extremely relaxed and somber after I've had a few. (Unless Britney is playing, then my ass is prancing around like a hooker on crack.)

But once I hit the point of no return, I have a habit of passing out in inappropriate places. Actual examples:

-Underneath a table at a bar on New Years Eve.
-On the ledge of a stage (please note: a band was performing while I was zonked out. I'm sure I did wonders for their confidence.)
-On a picnic table in the middle of a vineyard surrounded by families enjoying their lunch (as they watched me puke up mine.)
-A bathroom stall in a frat house...while still sitting on the toilet.

Thankfully, I have friends/babysitters who keep me from drowning, getting thrown out of bars, arrested, etc. Lo keeps joking that she's going to get me a leash or a tracking device for when we go out.

My most shining moment as of late? The quarter-century birthday extravaganza.

I meant to post a recap sooner, but we all now punctuality isn't my thing, so better late than never. :)

Needless to say, it was a succesful night. Good friends, good food, good tunes and most importantly, my wine glass was never empty.

After killing a bottle of pinot with SayJo and pounding the large juice-box shaped container of wine Biggie Smalls brought me, I was good to go. And quite appalled when the concert was over and the attendants began kicking people out of the venue.

I demanded, I mean, politely suggested, that we continue drinking at my apartment. I just wasn't ready for the party to stop.

Fast forward ten mintues later. Badass Roomie graciously served as our DD. I decided I needed to repay her by helping her drive. And by helping her drive I mean impending her ability to shift gears.

Then, I got a little frisky and tried to get fresh with her.

At least there was no passing out on stage next to Huey or in the bathroom. Maybe it's a sign I'm improving with age...or getting progressively lame. Hopefully it's not the latter.

A Day of Monumental Events

Today not only marks the birthday of your beloved Miss Procras, but also the anniversary of the day I met The Hoff. He had me at, “You know, we really have a lot in common.” Such a smooth talker, that Hoff. I have to say though, he’s the best birthday present I’ve ever gotten. (Cue the sappy music.)

To celebrate, a group of my nearest and dearest are going to a Huey Lewis and the News concert. Not gonna lie, I really don’t know many of their songs, but you better believe I’ll be rocking out, pretending to be showing off my mad Marty McFly skateboarding skills when they play “Power of Love.”

Mr. Lewis will be performing at one of my all-time favorite concert venues. It’s outdoors, and you can bring all the food and alcohol you’d like. I think more concert venues need to adopt this attitude. I’m sick of paying $11 for a flat, warm beer to keep my buzz going throughout an entire concert.

I’ll probably end up regretting this, but my plan is to drink wine all night. I’m 25 now – I need to at least pretend I’m classy.

If tonight goes anything like the last time I drank my weight in wine, I think I may be considered a candidate for VH1’s Charm School. You gotta dream big.

Full report of the night’s events tomorrow, pending I’m still alive/functioning.

Decisions, Decisions part 2

Yiles-ola. Didn’t realize it had been a week since I’ve posted.

I know you’ve been on the edge of your seats waiting for the conclusion of The Hoff’s birthday saga. (Major sarcasm there.) I don’t want to bore you all to tears, so I’ll just go with the condensed version.

I did end up going to his birthday celebration last Wednesday. Solo. I must have called 15 people to come with me but they were either working (overachievers) or still recuperating from Memorial Day weekend (lightweights.) I kid, I kid.

But the night actually went really well. No looks of disgust, no cold shoulders. If The Hoff’s friends hate me, they sure did a good job of hiding it.

Only awkward part of the evening was meeting some of The Hoff’s co-workers. They were both really nice, but they had no idea about our situation so they assumed I was just a friend.

Exhibit A: When I handed The Hoff his birthday card (with gift tucked inside), one of them said, “Oh, you’re so cute – you brought a card.”

Exhibit B: Same girl later introduced me to another co-worker as The Hoff’s friend. I wanted to correct her, but I wasn’t sure how to label myself, so I kept my mouth shut.

Other highlights of the evening:

-The Hoff really liked his gift. I got him tix to a Pats game and he’s never been to one so he’s pretty pumped.

-The Hoff (jokingly) demanded that his co-worker’s fiance buy him a shot when he arrived. He obliged buy purchasing The Hoff a bourbon shot, which sent him over the edge.

-I had to basically carry the birthday boy back to my car. We didn’t even make it out of the parking garage before I had to pull over so he could vomitando .

TMI play-by-play:
The Hoff immediately passes out when he gets in the car.
All of the sudden, I hear gurgling sounds.
Miss Procras: Are you gonna get sick?
The Hoff: (after jolting straight up, eyes wide open. YES!!”
So I pull over, right before the parking attendant booth, and was both amazed and relieved that The Hoff managed to avoid getting puke in my car. At least he has good aim, even when completely shitfaced.

- When we got back to The Hoff’s house, he disappeared to the bathroom for a while. When I went to check on him, I found him planted face-first in the sink. Wish I had a photo of that shining moment.

-Coerced The Hoff to move from the sink to his bed, placing a trashcan right next to him. Not two seconds later, the gurgling sounds start again so I shoved the trashcan in his face for vomitando round 2.

…a very successful 24th birthday if I do say so myself.

Decisions, Decisions

Happy Birthday, The Hoff, you young buck!

The Hoff turns 24 today and is slightly freaked out. I keep telling him to shut his hole since I turn 25 in three weeks. I’m sure some of you who are reading this want both of us to shut our holes.

Anyway, moving on. Tonight, he’s obviously going out with a group of friends to celebrate, and he invited me along. Here’s the dilemma: it will be the first time I’ve seen any of his friends since our relationship hit the skids.

I’m more than a little nervous.

I feel like I’m the warthog about to enter a pride of lions. I’m just waiting to see who tears me apart first.

I thought about not going. I have birthday festivities planned for The Hoff on Saturday so I know we could celebrate then. But today is his actual birthday and I want to be there for it, as I’m assuming he wants me there since he invited me.

And today is his day. I need to put my shit aside as do his friends (if they have any issues with me still) and let him enjoy his day. Hopefully, we can all act like mature adults.

Just incase, I’m bringing along a friend as an ally/wingman/shield buddy. It’ll be nice to have some reinforcement incase things get terribly awkward.

I still wonder though, am I making the right decision?